Rob,
Do you really need to update the entire grid? If the data form can be used to change only the current row in the main form, maybe, it's better just to update one row? And iGrid has the DrawCell method for that (in fact, it repaints the whole row for the specified cell because of the internal double buffering drawing optimization).
In any case, we would like to see a sample that demonstrates the issue to tell you how to overcome the problem.